


i could never say "don't leave me"

by Anilove



Category: Dangan Ronpa, Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair, Angst, Drama, Friendship, M/M, Romance, and possibly a few others, im sorry ive been re-reading the fault in our stars, komaeda is actually more appreciated, or acknowledged at least, possible triggers in later chapters, so basically this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-06
Updated: 2014-09-18
Packaged: 2018-02-16 08:33:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2262960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anilove/pseuds/Anilove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>because i know i will be the one to leave you first.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Near the end of my seventeenth year, my parents decided to conclude that I was in a state of depression.

Which was funny really- because I never looked like the kind of person to suffer depression. I didn't really have issues or cancer, but sometimes the loss of someone important could really leave a big scar on you.

And I hated that.

People die, it's a natural thing. We just don't know when or how, but we will. And there are like 7 billion people on Earth, so losing _one_ guy is barely a fraction if you include every single person ever.

I also hated the fact that I can't pass a day without thinking about you, when you aren't even with me anymore. I would just lay on the grass in the backyard and stare at the stars.

I would also read the letter you left for me.

And I would hear your stupid voice with each word that was written in the letter, and how you added that laugh at the end.

I just want to clarify that if we ever meet again  (which sounds stupid and cheesy but whatever),

Just don't tell me that you're fine, when you actually aren't.

Okay?

 


	2. Chapter 2

Ordinary. Boring. Typical.

All those words perfectly described Hinata Hajime's life. He was an ordinary young man, who was currently enjoying his long holidays, which were also uneventful. And ordinary.

He wasn't anyone special, and he didn't really have incredible talents. Simply normal. The end of the year was near, and so was his birthday as well. Birthdays were always tiring, or troublesome. His parents and friends would always convince him to do a double celebration: one for New Year's, and one for his birthday. Not that he didn't like it, but sometimes he would like to do something special for once.

And he thinks that he wants to do it on the upcoming New Year's (and of course his birthday). But here he was, lying on his bed, in his parent's house, and thinking about what to do with his life. _You have to get your life together, Hajime_. He thought, his brown eyes gazing blankly at the ceiling. His fingers twitched, and he stretched around on his bed when he realized that he had been still for the past few minutes. He probably even looked like a corpse, and the brunet chuckled at the thought.

His cell phone, which was right beside his pillow, suddenly vibrated. Hinata groaned for a bit, and reached for the phone as if he was on the verge of death. His fingers gripped onto the device, and he flipped it open." _Chiaki_ ", the message notification blinked, and he opened the message without missing a beat.

_Hi, Hajime-kun. Are you free this Saturday? If you are, do you want to come over?_

The brunet closed his eyes, and gave a quick thought about it. He nodded to himself a bit, before typing out his reply:

_I'll have to ask my parents. I'll text you my decision around tonight?_

Hinata sighed, and turned over to the left. A yawn escaped his lips, and his eyes started to droop.

"Hajime! I made some sandwiches! Do you want some?", his mother's muffled voice called him from outside his room. _Food_ , he thought. The brunet lazily rolled off his bed, landing with a _thump!_ He slowly made way to his door, tripping over his bag and ended up smacking his face into his door.

\--*--

"Is this sandwich an ancient recipe brought down by the previous generations of our family?", Hinata asked while finishing off his third sandwich. His father looked at him over the newspaper he was reading, "Always ready to gobble your mother's sandwich, even if you ended up smacking your own face."

"Well, at least he had the will to come down", his mother commented, setting a new set of sandwiches on the kitchen pantry before going over to sit at the dining table with him. He groaned, "Hey, do you understand how amazing these sandwiches are? I bet if we used it to enter a gourmet cooking contest, it would come up as the winner."

"Thank you, Hajime. When you are old enough, I'll give you the recipe with the specific ingredients." Hinata's mother chuckled, taking one sandwich herself. "Oh right, do we have any plans for the weekend?", he asked, remembering about his friend's message. His father flipped a page,

"Did Nanami invite you to her house?"

Hinata blinked, "Whoa..Uh yeah. She did. She said on Saturday." His mother rested her hand on her hand, "Well, it shouldn't be a problem. Her house isn't that far either, but if you choose to use your skateboard, be careful." He sighed, mumbling "Yeah yeah.."

His father closed the newspaper and looked at him, "I have a meeting that day, so I won't be home until late night." Hinata gave a nod, before standing up. "I'm going for a walk", he went over to the front door and took his jacket from the coat hanger. He took his sneakers off the shoe rack, putting them on quickly.

"Be careful, Hajime! Come back before dinner time!" His mother shouted as he walked out the door. A gust of wind immediately blew, and he shivered for a bit before deciding to wear the jacket straight away. He opened the gate, and stepped back in surprise when a cycler passed by him quickly. The brunet checked his surroundings before finally stepping out and closing the gate.

_Okay, so..the park, or the industrial side?_ , he thought as he walked, his sneakers crunching the ground underneath him. Suddenly, he felt something vibrate in his pocket, and he took out his cell phone. He opened the new message he received from Nanami.

_Okay._

Hinata thought about how the hell it took 30 minutes for her to reply him back a word with 4 letters.

\--*--

"Wow, it's really windy today." he muttered as he took the can of coffee from the vending machine outside some apartment he usually sees during his walks. The brunet opened it, and drank it without a second thought. Bad idea, because it was _boiling hot_. He coughed and screamed from the burning sensation on his tongue, and he wanted it to end real quickly because _he is screaming in the middle of the street_.

"Damn it!", he shouted, sticking his tongue out a little in blind hopes that it will help the pain go away.

"Um...."

Hinata turned back quickly, surprised from the sudden voice (and partially embarrassed from being caught in his ridiculous act). He blinked at the person before him. His appearance was....unordinary? He didn't know how to describe it. The man, who was looking at him with a worried expression, had white hair, really pale skin. And _Oh God_ those grey-greenish eyes that stared at him with confusion and worry- he just wanted to dig a hole and bury himself in it.

"Mister..Are you listening? Are you alright?", the stranger asked, putting his hands up in which Hinata couldn't tell if the man was hesitantly trying to reach for him or to defend _himself_. The brunet could feel his cheeks heat up, and he stuttered (not from nervousness mind you) as he spoke.

"U-uh, yeah..I just...I drank the canned coffee immediately forgetting that it was hot. So..yeah..", he looked everywhere but the stranger's face. He heard footsteps moving towards him. "Oh, I see. Well, I hope you didn't burn your tongue! I was worried that you were suffering a major disease or something.", the white haired man said his words in a cheerful, positive tone. He was even smiling when Hinata finally looked at him.

"No..Uh..Have we met before?", the brunet stared cautiously at the stranger. "No..I don't recall either. But I'm not someone worth remembering anyway!", the man seemed to savor each word with that same carefree smile, earning a look of confusion from the brunet. "Not worth remembering...?", he started to take sips of his coffee.

"......Yes." The white haired man looked down, his abnormally curly hair covering his eyes. Hinata wanted to question him, but then he remembered that he should be on his way home now. "Ah, crap. I need to go back!", the brunet was about to turn back when he froze. He turned back to see that the man had already started to go into the apartment building. _He's fast...! And quiet!_ , he hesitated, before shouting:

"H-hey!"

The white haired man turned back, a surprised look plastered on his face.

"U-uh..I'm Hinata Hajime. Is it okay for me to know your name too?"

The said man in question seemed taken aback by the brunet's offer, and he smiled. It was small, but it didn't give off a wrong vibe in it this time,

"...My name is Komaeda Nagito. It is a pleasure to meet you."

Hinata smiled back before running back home, not forgetting to wave at his new...friend. Well, a new person he just met. Something about Komaeda just made the brunet really curious, and he wanted to know more about him. He felt something wet dripping on his jeans and shirt, and he looked down to see brown spots. He came to a halt.

It took him 5 seconds to realize that he hadn't thrown away the can of coffee.

\--*--

2 days of doing the laundry.

That was the punishment that Hinata earned for coming back late _and_ staining his clothes. Well, he just did the laundry. And he had a good dinner too. And he just came out of the shower, which was really satisfying. He plopped onto his bed, drying his hair before leaving the towel hanging around his neck. The brunet stretched, and let out a big moan. He lay on his bed, his wet hair wetting his pillow and the bed sheets.

He took his cell phone and flipped it open. No new messages. He searched for Nanami's number, and opened their messaging history. His fingers typed a new message, and each word didn't contain a single typo:

_Okay. So I'm coming over this Saturday._

The brunet pressed the send button. He yawned and dropped his hand (with the phone by the way) to his stomach, grunting at the impact. It hadn't even been a minute and he felt his phone vibrate. He flipped it open.

_Okay :D_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The actual beginning (aka this chapter) takes place around the beginning of October. Well, Hinata is taking a holiday from uh..school. College. I don't know much about this. But I can tell you guys the story ends around right after his birthday.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I did this late at night so I decided to split this chapter into two. The next one will be a continuation.

"I have a proposition to make."

Hinata craned his neck to the source of the voice, and so did the other people in the room.

"We should play this game called....'Five Nights at Freddy's", Nanami declared, turning her computer screen over so everyone could see the menu screen. It displayed a rather plain black background, full of static. A few animal figures could be vaguely spotted beside the menu selections. Well, the brunet could expect no less from his gamer friend. It was Saturday, after all. Why not? But the game looks...scary. Souda, a friend of his from high school, paled at the sight of the said game. "Hey...That's the horror game everyone's been talking 'bout right...?" Leon, a friend of Souda, nodded enthusiastically, his face etched in a nervous expression. Tsumiki, a friend of Nanami, fidgeted, but otherwise stayed silent. The pink haired girl tilted her head, "........You don't want to?"

"Hey, don't tell me you guys are scared of it. In front of Chiaki too." Hinata smirked, earning a glare from Souda. "Dude, you ain't good with horror stuff either", the magenta haired man crossed his arms. "I'm not playing that." Nanami puffed her cheeks, and waited for everyone's response. "Yeah..I'm not playing it either. Not today", Leon scratched his head, averting his eyes from the self-proclaimed hardcore gamer. Tsumiki nervously raised her hand, "U-um...I don't mind either. I'll just do w-what Nanami-san says.." The girl immediately started to have tears well up in her eyes, and she  mumbled "I'm sorry I'm sorry So sorry Forgive me". Nanami quickly went to her and reassured that everything was fine. Hinata sighed. Well, in the end, they ended up not playing the game. The brunet thought that it would've been more fun if more people joined to play (not because it would be less scary or anything okay). By 2:00 pm the group was just lying around in Nanami's bedroom (and gaming room of course), eating snacks and asking questions. "Oi, Hajime, anything new happening here?" Souda asked, flashing his toothy grin.

"Nah......Wait, I met this guy", Hinata looked up to the ceiling, thinking about how to summarize everything up. He's caught everyone's attention by then, even Nanami paused her game and ended up listening to the brunet's story. "Well, I just met him during my walk. He lives at the apartment close to the park around my neighbourhood. He's....friendly. Kinda good-hearted. He has white hair, and grey-greenish eyes. His skin is really pale too. His name is Komaeda Nagito if I remember correctly, and he looks around my age too."

_Well, this is true. It all happened..I just didn't tell them about how we met. We met because I immediately drank hot coffee so I screamed from the pain and caught his attention. Yes._

"Oh....You got things going for 'ya, Hinata." Leon gave him a thumbs up, before using that same hand to pick his nose. Nanami stared at him with a questionable expression, before slowly tilting her head. ".....Why not you talk with him more, then? I mean, we aren't really doing anything......And you should use this chance to try and talk to him...I think."

"Huh? But I don't even know which room he stays in!", Hinata just realized that could've meant something else without context. The brunet felt something pat at his shoulder, and he looked back to see Souda w _ait_ _when did he even_  -

"You just gotta rely on luck, then! Who knows, it might actually work!"

"U-um...."

Everyone looked at Tsumiki, who flinched at everyone's reaction. "I-I think you should try and get to know him as early as y-you can. T-to leave g-good impressions. B-because it wouldn't do to just yearn to be f-friends hawaawawawa I'm sorry I know I'm terrible at giving advice!! I only specialize in medical affairs I can't help Hinata-san I'm sorry!"

Souda scratched his head, but didn't do anything. Nanami once again helped the girl calm down, and Hinata just pities the her at times. But his friends are right. And he should practice what they preach. He's gonna go back to his neighbourhood, find him-

\--*--

-and that's not gonna happen. Because it's raining heavily and he's stuck in the shopping district. 

_Screw you Souda._

The brunet leaned against the wall, watching people pass by and occasionally check his cell phone out of boredom, but never sent any messages. He knew they would ask him about how the 'bonding time with this Komaeda guy' went, without thinking about any other outcome. Hinata just wants the rain to end so he can go home and read a book or something and-

"Oh. This is quite **fortunate,** isn't it?"

_Wait....What?_

Hinata turned to see Komaeda, drenched, walking over to stand beside him. His hoodie was completely soaked, but surprisingly his pants weren't really that wet. Now  **this** is something. The brunet stared at man, earning a look of confusion. "What is it?", the white haired man asked. Hinata blinked and shook his head. "Nothing...Uh..I just didn't expect meeting you here." He played with the collar of his jacket, trying to not sound awkward. Komaeda laughed, soft and breathy. "I thought the same thing! I guess I just got lucky." The brunet smiled in response. _This is going pretty well...._ , he thought, looking up to see that the rain has stopped. Well, it was drizzling now. Komaeda started to walk away from the shop(s), and gave Hinata a glance.

"Let's go, shall we?"

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

The walk on the way home was...unnervingly quiet.

Komaeda walked with a straight posture, hands in pockets while Hinata was just a few steps behind the man, casting wary glances at him. It was still drizzling, the small drops landing on both of their clothing and their heads."Are you cold, Hinata-san?", the man suddenly asked, causing Hinata to flinch. The brunet gave a small smile as soon as the other turned to face him, "No..I'm fine. And drop the '-san', Hajime is fine".

Komaeda seemed perplexed by the response, staring at him with unreadable eyes. "Alright, Hinata-kun", the white haired man continued walking. Hinata blinked, before running over to stand in front of him. "H-hey! I said-"

"You _said_ ", a pale finger was put to the brunet's lips. "to drop the '-san'. That was what you said, Hi-na-ta-kun". Komaeda seemed almost smug at that moment, and Hinata gritted his teeth in irritation. The white haired man withdrew his finger then gave a smirk before walking past the brunet, who turned back quickly and grasped the other's left hand.

" _And_ to call me-"

He pulled the white haired man towards him (to _stop_ him okay), surprised when the other didn't show any sign of resistance. The white haired man ended up toppling over him, and they fell to the ground with a _THUD!_

"Ow...", brown eyes slowly fluttered open, only to widen when they met grey-greenish orbs staring back.

Hinata felt his breath hitch, and perhaps this is the mo _st awkward thing that has ever happened oh God why_ \- Thousands of words flashed through his head, but he couldn't bring himself to say them.

Not with Komaeda's face centimeters away from his own, staring at him with those wide eyes and that flushed face.

The rain drops trickled down those white locks, landing onto the brunet's face. "Hinata-kun..?", the white haired man called out, the drops trickling down his face now, almost looking like he was crying. Hinata must have spaced out for a while there, because he brought one hand up to caress Komaeda's face, wiping away the rain drops with his thumb.

The other's eyebrows furrowed in confusion, his mouth parted.

"Are you two alright?"

Both of them quickly snapped their heads towards the voice- A woman with short, curly hair stared at them in disbelief (and shock, Hinata guessed). Komaeda quickly got off the said brunet, "Yes! I just happened to have slipped and fell backwards, toppling over him! Don't worry about us, miss!". Hinata nodded absent-mindedly, trying to process what just happened. He stood up, stumbling a bit before straightening up.

"Er..Yes. I just tried to catch him but I guess I kinda fell as well", the brunet backed up the other's statement as best as he could, scratching his wet head. The woman frowned before walking past them. He could've sworn he saw the same woman shook her head as she walked away. _Hey, at least you got an umbrella-_

"Hinata-kun, turn around", Komaeda ordered earning a look of confusion. "What-"

" ** _Do_** it".

Well, that certainly made the brunet comply. The other's voice was definitely a 'don't even try' kind of tone. Hinata felt the other's hands on the back of his head, pressing onto specific spots. "Um...what?", he really wanted to look back and see what the Hell was Komaeda even doing. A sigh. And then, the hands were gone. The brunet turned back almost immediately, checking the back of his head with his hands.

"What was that about?!"

"Nothing. I was just checking", the white haired man flashed his signature smile, before walking away quickly.

_You're just going to leave like that?!_

"H-hey! You don't just check a person's head and then dismiss it like that!"

Well, he knew it was pointless anyway. Komaeda already left (seriously, he is damn good at that). He felt a drop of water land on his nose, almost jumping away in surprise. The brunet sighed, _Well that escalated_. He would never be able to look at Komaeda in the eye ever again. Not without remembering what happened today. What was he even going to say to his friends??

_"So like, am I counted as a homo now??"_ He mentally slapped himself for thinking that.

Hinata knew though that another part of him wished that that moment should've lasted longer.

\--*--

_One. Two. Three._

Three drops of water from the water tap, into the bathtub. A sigh escaped from his lips, and he reached up to brush his hair away with those pale white fingers of his. His cheeks were still a little flushed from what happened with _him_ a few hours ago, and he brought up his hand to his face. He tried to imitate the caress he received, before giving up because it was too embarrassing and _shameless_.

He didn't even deserve to approach _him_ that day.

He glanced at the pill bottles on the sink- placed neatly next to a notebook.

Yes, he should be the one suffering. Not making other people suffer for his needs.

But deep down, he knew he was attracted to Hinata Hajime.

A beautiful, interesting and kind soul that stepped into his life.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was cheesy as fuck and it isn't even supposed to be a shoujo manga.
> 
> But....we got some development here (I hope it's not going too fast) and we even got to see a glimpse of Komaeda's point of view.

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, here's the prologue (which is basically like after the ending).I think you can guess who's point of view is this. *wink wink*
> 
> But the story will be in third person view, and might alter between characters.


End file.
